We know there are a lot of questions about adoption, and we wanted to share the information we’ve learned. We’re tagging these posts as “Information Series” in hopes it will be easier for everyone to find. Let us know what questions you have about adoption. Others may have the same questions.
Just when we thought we had the adoption lingo down, we found a new one: private adoption. Sure, we’ve heard the phrase, but it’s not used by Virginia adoption advocates very often. We hear the phrase mostly by friends, family, and out-of-state sources, but what does it really mean?
Private adoption can mean something different to each person. It can include adoptions through agencies, lawyers, or parental placements. Agencies and lawyers help expectant mothers find prospective adoptive parents. Both agencies and lawyers usually have profiles of waiting families for expectant mothers to browse. Parental placements are where a biological parent gives adoptive parents custody. Expectant mothers and prospective adoptive parents may know each other previously, have mutual contacts, find each other online, or meet any other number of amazing connections.
What does this mean for us? While we plan to work with an agency, we hope by sharing our story, we will connect with an expectant mother on our own. Working with an agency just allows another avenue to find a match. We’ll be starting our home study process soon, and we’ll hopefully be a waiting family with an agency by June. We can still find a match on our own, so sharing our story and desire to adopt is still necessary.
Thank you for keeping us in mind.
Recipe for Family 
All three of our matches came to us through private matches via acquaintances! My best advice is to get the word out that you are interested in adopting. We were very transparent with our struggles with infertility so many knew that we were interested in having children, but unable. Once matched, we worked with an agency to facilitate the adoption. It helped to have the social work support for the expectant moms and they mediated paying for the birth mother expenses that our state allows. We payed the amount that our state allows and then they gave the expectant moms gift cards for needs and required receipts in return so we knew that the money was being spent correctly.
Best of luck!
LikeLike
That’s amazing! Our friends and families have been sharing. It’s exciting to see how excited they are for us and how willing everyone is to share our story. At what point did you complete your home study?
LikeLike
We were contacted about our first match before we had decided to go forward with adopting. We needed a break from trying to have a family. We had to quickly get the home study done once we decised to go forward with the adoption. It was a little crazy!
LikeLike
I bet! We’ll be starting ours very soon. Hopefully we’ll be having a post in the next week or two about it. ~Jess
LikeLike
Hello:) First of all, I want to say congratulations and how exciting!! My husband and I are close to the same stage as you guys, just a little bit ahead; we just finished our home study about a month and a half ago and are waiting on provincial papers (we are from Canada) 🙂 I can’t wait for you guys to meet your future little boy/girl!
LikeLike
Thank you so much! We can’t wait until we are officially in the pool, but we know waiting will have its own challenges. Can’t wait to catch up on your blog 🙂 ~Jess
LikeLiked by 1 person