Adoption Paths to Parenthood

One of the most popular questions we have been asked is about the different types of adoption, specifically international and foster care. We are so glad to hear that so many of our loved ones are aware that there is more than one adoption route and supportive of our choice to adopt. We also appreciate those of you have reached out to us and shared how adoption has played a role in your family. It’s been encouraging to hear! 

We’ve considered the options and decided on the best route for our family. Adoptive parents decide to pursue one type of adoption for a multitude of reasons. Some families even pursue more than one type over the course of their life. There is no right or wrong adoption path. What’s right for one family might not be right for another. Children need forever families no matter how they come to be.

In our infertility journey, we have always said that no two stories are the same, yet we are all united in the same struggle. The same seems to be true for adoption. Even if the same adoption route is taken, there are still differences from one family to another and one child to another. One family’s story can be comforting to hear, but it doesn’t necessarily mean our family’s story will be the same.

There are three types of adoption: international, domestic private, and domestic public. Prospective adoptive parents (that’s us 🙂 ) have to decide which type of adoption they want to pursue before their home study. We didn’t feel it was necessary to recreate the wheel, so we’ve linked to a good chart of the similarities and differences of the three types of adoption here. For the purposes of this discussion, private does not mean a closed adoption. The phrase “private domestic adoptions” can refer to adoptions through an adoption attorney, an adoption agency, or a parental placement (where a birth mother places her child directly in the care of an adoptive family). Private only means that social services is not involved (like in foster care adoption). We’ve learned a lot about adoption online as well as through forums, meetings, and books. We felt the chart summarized all we had learned when comparing the types of agencies.

After carefully considering our options and the differences between adoption types, we decided to pursue domestic infant adoption. We want to experience all the firsts. First diapers. First baths. First smiles. First laughs. First teeth. First steps. First falls.

Not all the firsts might seem all that glamorous, especially to those who have experienced them. We look forward to all the good and bad times, because it’s all new for us. We know we’ll look fondly on every minute of being parents. We know, because even though infertility has been hard, it’s shown us who we really are. We’re strong and loving. Between the two us, we can even joke about it all. We wouldn’t change it for the world, because we have faith it all be worth it in the end.

To learn more about adoption, click the “Information Series” tag. Let us know what questions you have about adoption. Others may have the same questions.

BW Chris and Jess Heart Signature

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